A short list of the reasons the new Indy movie sucks.

Kudos to me for my most internet-y blog title yet.

1. The utterly fantastic Cate Blanchett looks fantastic, acts fantastic, but can’t get over the fact the character’s a bit rubbish, really.
2. The Nazis actually did have bizarre expectations regarding occult artefacts; the Soviets did not.
3. There is too much CGI. Not as bad as the Star War prequels, but dude: too much CGI.
4. The movie just plain cops out on several levels, becoming downright sickening at certain points in a lame attempt at fan service.
5. Spielberg and Lucas are old.

Never in a million years did I think I would audibly groan at several points during an Indiana Jones movie. Suspension of disbelief is a given, and difficult to dispel: congratulations Harrison and friends, you did it. I am really, really disappointed.


4 responses to “A short list of the reasons the new Indy movie sucks.

  1. I love that the first thing you did was immediately post a blog about it. We are such nerds!

    Indy SUCKED though, hardcore. Disappointment is a good word. It’s like someone I really trusted just punched me in the guts. Ugh.

  2. i agree, it sucked. and that says a lot, cos i think i’m the least critical (of films) person i know.

    i mean, when the first thing you see is a CGI praire dog, you know you’re in trouble.

  3. I know, right? Lucas and his cutesy crap. Best line in television ever (from Spaced), in relation to another Lucas creation:

    Bill Bailey: What about the Ewoks, you liked them?
    Simon Pegg: Jar Jar Binks makes the Ewoks look like fucking Shaft!

  4. The Soviets are second only to Nazi’s in the American imagination, therefore they are quite capable of anything.

    I love Spaced. Love…

    And I hope the CGI monkeys ate the CGI prairie dogs before ETs ugly cousin beamed them all up into their Mayan space ship.

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